https://xwf1999.com/ Mon, 14 Sep 2026 05:40:53 +0000 MyBB https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50463 Sun, 13 Sep 2026 19:58:29 -0700 johnathan]]> https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50463 Tig Collins: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome my guest at this time... John... Blade.

The children in the building are watching the titantron, screaming and cheering as loudly as their little lungs

can handle. The rest of the fans in attendance seem less than enthused, and they let the Chain Gang

know about it by cheering him as he enters the picture.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade:  Tig Collins, it is good to see you, my girl! How have you been?

John hits Steve on the back with a little more force than was probably necessary. Collins tries to move the microphone back to herself to say something, but The Chain Gang tilts it back over to him.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: And there is no better place for me to reunite than right here in... Austin, Texas.

Naturally, the sheepish fans clap and cheer for the name of their city as they always do.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: You know what I'm saying, Tig?

Blade laughs and finally allows Tig to get a word in.

Tig Collins: I actually don't, I'm afraid. I don't speak Mandarin. But I do want to officially

welcome you back to the XWF RDR and, of course, back to Friday night RDR. It hasn't been

the same without you!

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: You can say that again.

The Chain Gang waits patiently for Tig, who looks around, confused by the situation he currently finds himself in.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: You can say that again.

John stares down at Steve until the light finally turns on.

Tig Collins: The XWF hasn't been the same without you?

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: No, it certainly has not. We can't be ungrateful, though, right? As bad as this

Company has been over the past several months, I would be remiss if I didn't at least acknowledge that damn woman... these kids are trying their best. Sure, most of the locker room is filled with forgettable, pint-sized men with as much charisma as my pinky toe. Definitely, the so-called

'' Superstars'' still picking up that pension check are good for a laugh every now and again. Look, I'm not being disrespected here, Tig.

Tig Collins: It sounds a little disrespectful.

Surgeon of thug| John Blade: Then please allow me to change my tone. Guys like Deena Hixx... I just think he should take a cue from, as you saw earlier, he tried his best to

keep up with one of us, the Geek Goddess, The Greatest of all time, and she won

miserably. Then she

packed up her bags, realized that her time in the game had passed, and she limped back to Austin, Texas

That's all I'm saying. A woman like Deena Hixx, she has had one hell of a career. I mean, one of the best

ever. But this time is over, Tig. Our Time. Well, you know the rest.

Tig Collins: Ok. This isn't really even what I was going to ask you about this Sunday.

Chain Gang| John Blade: Alright, fair enough. Shoot.

Tig Collins: this Friday you'll defend the Blade Championship in a two out of three Falls match against Deena Hixx. There is no shortage of history between the two of you in the same ring together

either. Countless matches. You have run the match of friendship and Xtreme hatred. Are you

excited to get back in the ring with Deena Hixx for the first time, and now with so much at stake, trying to tip the scales of war into Peter's Principle's favor?

Blade sighs loudly and shakes his head for a moment.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade:  Yeah, sure.  Peter Principle and All that. Look, were The one who's gonna win this two out of falls match on Blade Championship so it lies on my massively broad shoulders to carry the load for a two out of three Falls bunch of RDR. I mean,

there are some outliers on this RDR. some Two out of three falls in the rough. I love what the XWF is

doing. Deena Hixx is a bona fide star, Deena...

The crowd chants Deena.

Surgeon of Thug|John Blade:  Is the next XWF RDR two out of three falls. And I'm great. They got the

other one as well. But yeah, the majority of this collaboration is quite frankly dead weight, and it's

a tough load that I have to carry, but thankfully I always have...

Surgeon of Thug|John Blade: Hefty Strong Clean Burst. Strength that's anything but ordinary.

Tig Collins:  What is going on?

Chain Gang|John Blade: So yes. I have no doubt that we will take care of business this Friday like I always do, and I'll lead this two-out-of-three falls PLE RDR to victory.

Tig Collins: You didn't even mention the XWF RDR side of the two-out-of-three falls. Guys like

Deena Hixx?

Chain Gang|John Blade: I literally have no idea who those people are.

John smiles into the camera.

Tig Collins: Alright. So What's the two-out-of-three falls, John Blade? What is going to be your legacy? What are you going to accomplish before you hang up the Air Jordans?

Blade looks down at an invisible watch on his wristband and then off camera.

Chain Gang|John Blade: CUT!

With that, Blade moves out of frame, and Steve looks around, extremely confused by the entire

Situation. Only a few silent moments later and ' John Blade returns and nods at Tig.

Chain Gang| John Blade: ''Hey, what's good, Tig?

Tig Collins:  Deena Hixx?

Chain Gang| John Blade:  No matter if anybody here likes it or not. The Chain Gang, The Surgeon of Thug, The Champ, The Leader of Bladenation, and The Greatest of Ever Do It is...

Back! We be ready. We stay ready. We always be about that motto of Hustle, Loyalty, and Respect. Never Give. Up Surrender. Go pick up your copies of The Legendary, now re-released on Blu-ray 4K. Also, don't miss Legendary premiering and streaming exclusively

on XWF. Any more questions, Tig?

Tig Collins: Just one. What is happening right now?

' John Blade' looks off camera and nods a few times before turning back to the interviewer.

Chain Gang|John Blade: What's going on right now is we're about to head out there in front of this sold-out

crowd in Austin and put on a show the likes of which they have never seen before. Because

The Champ...

Some of the fans finish the catchphrase, but most are just confused.

Chain Gang | ' John Blade': Is headed your way.

With 'John Blade'  waves his hand in front of his face and rushes off the scene, leaving Tig to

stand there dumbfounded with microphone still in hand.

]]> Tig Collins: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome my guest at this time... John... Blade.

The children in the building are watching the titantron, screaming and cheering as loudly as their little lungs

can handle. The rest of the fans in attendance seem less than enthused, and they let the Chain Gang

know about it by cheering him as he enters the picture.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade:  Tig Collins, it is good to see you, my girl! How have you been?

John hits Steve on the back with a little more force than was probably necessary. Collins tries to move the microphone back to herself to say something, but The Chain Gang tilts it back over to him.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: And there is no better place for me to reunite than right here in... Austin, Texas.

Naturally, the sheepish fans clap and cheer for the name of their city as they always do.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: You know what I'm saying, Tig?

Blade laughs and finally allows Tig to get a word in.

Tig Collins: I actually don't, I'm afraid. I don't speak Mandarin. But I do want to officially

welcome you back to the XWF RDR and, of course, back to Friday night RDR. It hasn't been

the same without you!

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: You can say that again.

The Chain Gang waits patiently for Tig, who looks around, confused by the situation he currently finds himself in.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: You can say that again.

John stares down at Steve until the light finally turns on.

Tig Collins: The XWF hasn't been the same without you?

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade: No, it certainly has not. We can't be ungrateful, though, right? As bad as this

Company has been over the past several months, I would be remiss if I didn't at least acknowledge that damn woman... these kids are trying their best. Sure, most of the locker room is filled with forgettable, pint-sized men with as much charisma as my pinky toe. Definitely, the so-called

'' Superstars'' still picking up that pension check are good for a laugh every now and again. Look, I'm not being disrespected here, Tig.

Tig Collins: It sounds a little disrespectful.

Surgeon of thug| John Blade: Then please allow me to change my tone. Guys like Deena Hixx... I just think he should take a cue from, as you saw earlier, he tried his best to

keep up with one of us, the Geek Goddess, The Greatest of all time, and she won

miserably. Then she

packed up her bags, realized that her time in the game had passed, and she limped back to Austin, Texas

That's all I'm saying. A woman like Deena Hixx, she has had one hell of a career. I mean, one of the best

ever. But this time is over, Tig. Our Time. Well, you know the rest.

Tig Collins: Ok. This isn't really even what I was going to ask you about this Sunday.

Chain Gang| John Blade: Alright, fair enough. Shoot.

Tig Collins: this Friday you'll defend the Blade Championship in a two out of three Falls match against Deena Hixx. There is no shortage of history between the two of you in the same ring together

either. Countless matches. You have run the match of friendship and Xtreme hatred. Are you

excited to get back in the ring with Deena Hixx for the first time, and now with so much at stake, trying to tip the scales of war into Peter's Principle's favor?

Blade sighs loudly and shakes his head for a moment.

Surgeon of Thug| John Blade:  Yeah, sure.  Peter Principle and All that. Look, were The one who's gonna win this two out of falls match on Blade Championship so it lies on my massively broad shoulders to carry the load for a two out of three Falls bunch of RDR. I mean,

there are some outliers on this RDR. some Two out of three falls in the rough. I love what the XWF is

doing. Deena Hixx is a bona fide star, Deena...

The crowd chants Deena.

Surgeon of Thug|John Blade:  Is the next XWF RDR two out of three falls. And I'm great. They got the

other one as well. But yeah, the majority of this collaboration is quite frankly dead weight, and it's

a tough load that I have to carry, but thankfully I always have...

Surgeon of Thug|John Blade: Hefty Strong Clean Burst. Strength that's anything but ordinary.

Tig Collins:  What is going on?

Chain Gang|John Blade: So yes. I have no doubt that we will take care of business this Friday like I always do, and I'll lead this two-out-of-three falls PLE RDR to victory.

Tig Collins: You didn't even mention the XWF RDR side of the two-out-of-three falls. Guys like

Deena Hixx?

Chain Gang|John Blade: I literally have no idea who those people are.

John smiles into the camera.

Tig Collins: Alright. So What's the two-out-of-three falls, John Blade? What is going to be your legacy? What are you going to accomplish before you hang up the Air Jordans?

Blade looks down at an invisible watch on his wristband and then off camera.

Chain Gang|John Blade: CUT!

With that, Blade moves out of frame, and Steve looks around, extremely confused by the entire

Situation. Only a few silent moments later and ' John Blade returns and nods at Tig.

Chain Gang| John Blade: ''Hey, what's good, Tig?

Tig Collins:  Deena Hixx?

Chain Gang| John Blade:  No matter if anybody here likes it or not. The Chain Gang, The Surgeon of Thug, The Champ, The Leader of Bladenation, and The Greatest of Ever Do It is...

Back! We be ready. We stay ready. We always be about that motto of Hustle, Loyalty, and Respect. Never Give. Up Surrender. Go pick up your copies of The Legendary, now re-released on Blu-ray 4K. Also, don't miss Legendary premiering and streaming exclusively

on XWF. Any more questions, Tig?

Tig Collins: Just one. What is happening right now?

' John Blade' looks off camera and nods a few times before turning back to the interviewer.

Chain Gang|John Blade: What's going on right now is we're about to head out there in front of this sold-out

crowd in Austin and put on a show the likes of which they have never seen before. Because

The Champ...

Some of the fans finish the catchphrase, but most are just confused.

Chain Gang | ' John Blade': Is headed your way.

With 'John Blade'  waves his hand in front of his face and rushes off the scene, leaving Tig to

stand there dumbfounded with microphone still in hand.

]]> https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50462 Sun, 13 Sep 2026 16:28:46 -0700 Jeffrye421]]> https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50462

The scene opens on a sweeping shot of the desert outside New Austin, Texas. The all-new Ford F-150 comes barreling down a dusty back road. Main Event MC Edgecrusher is behind the wheel, wearing his regular "gangsta" attire, but this time a black cowboy hat sits atop his backwards baseball cap, which sits atop a dew rag, which sits atop his head. Main Event does his best cool-looking cowboy hat adjustment and looks into the camera.

MEMC EC: Howdy, dawgs.

He continues driving in silence for a few minutes.

MEMC EC: You know, people ask me all the time... they ask me... "Who are you?" and "What are you doing here?" But that's beside the point.

The Edgecrusher reaches into the nearby cup holder and grabs a nice, cold Pepsi Zero Sugar.

MEMC EC: But if they did ask me something other than that, and wanted to know what beverage I prefer while driving through Texas in a vehicle I don't own...

Main Event MC Edgecrusher holds the can of soda up, label facing the wrong direction. He realizes his mistake and adjusts the can, causing the truck to swerve slightly.

MEMC EC: Pepsi...

He cracks open the can, causing the truck to swerve again, takes a massive gulp, and instantly spits it out all over the windshield.

MEMC EC: Ahhh... this tastes like crap. What the hell is this?

He looks closer at the can.

MEMC EC: Zero Sugar? Who the hell wants to drink fucking sugarless Pepsi? Regular Pepsi is bad enough...

He remembers why he's randomly driving around on back roads with some sweaty production guy shoving a camera in his face.

MEMC EC: Pepsi, the choice of the next generation.

He gives a half-hearted thumbs-up and wings the can of Pepsi Zero Sugar out the all-new Ford F-150's window.

MEMC EC: And ya know what goes great with Pepsi Zero Sugar?

The Edgecrusher reaches into the passenger seat of the all-new Ford F-150, causing more swerving, and pulls out a bag of Taco Bell. He looks into the bag. Its contents have been spilled from the back-and-forth jerking of the all-new Ford F-150. He pulls out a handful of random broken taco shells, beef, and various toppings. Sauce and grease drip down his arm and onto the upholstery of the all-new Ford F-150.

MEMC EC: Well, technically there's a Crunchwrap somewhere in there.

The Main Event shoves the glob of what Taco Bell calls food into his mouth and starts chewing. More of it spills down the front of his shirt and into his lap than makes it into his mouth. He smiles toward the camera and speaks, food spilling from his mouth.

MEMC EC: Taco Bell... because tomorrow is Future You's problem!

He tosses the bag of Taco Bell out of the all-new Ford F-150's window. The bag smacks a random hitchhiker directly in the face and explodes. Main Event MC Edgecrusher turns to look at the chaos, and the truck fishtails and takes out several road signs before he's able to straighten back out and regain control. The Edgecrusher looks back into the camera.

MEMC EC: Good thing I've got Progressive Insurance... well... not really. I buy my car insurance from a guy out the back of a van behind the gas station.

He looks back at the road.

MEMC EC: But you could! Progressive Insurance! Because "My bad" isn't legally binding.

Main Event nods approvingly like he just dropped the realest bit of knowledge ever on the world and keeps driving.

MEMC EC: Speaking of terrible financial decisions, you know what?

The Edgecrusher pulls out his phone, causing him to swerve and take out another road sign.

MEMC EC: DraftKings!

He glances at his screen like it's the first time he's ever seen the app, because it is indeed the first time he has ever seen the app.

MEMC EC: You can bet on sports! Probably.

He glances back at his screen and taps a few buttons. The truck swerves some more, and we hear some screams.

MEMC EC: I just put forty dollars on myself to understand what a parlay is by the end of the commercial.

He tosses his phone onto the grease-soaked passenger seat.

MEMC EC: DraftKings... because fuck your kids' college tuition!

Main Event MC Edgecrusher suddenly looks extremely concerned. He begins patting his pockets. This, of course, causes him to swerve again, taking out even more road signs.

MEMC EC: Where the hell is my... there it is!

The Edgecrusher holds up a share-sized Snickers bar.

MEMC EC: You're not you when you're hungry.

He pauses and thinks about it.

MEMC EC: Which is actually terrifying when you really think about it. Who am I when I'm hungry?

Another long pause.

MEMC EC: Who is even driving this all-new Ford F-150? Is Main Event MC Edgecrusher merely the temporary manifestation of a sufficiently fed consciousness?

He slowly unwraps the share-sized Snickers bar with his teeth.

MEMC EC: Anyway... Snickers... were you ever really you to begin with?

The Edgecrusher eats the entire bar in a single bite, the long way.

MEMC EC: Sometimes you're really thirsty and...

The Edgecrusher visibly struggles not to gag.

MEMC EC: ...sometimes Pepsi Zero Sugar isn't enough.

More swerving and screams from a cat as he reaches behind the seat and pulls out a bottle of Mountain Dew, carefully inspecting the label.

MEMC EC: That's when you need a nice, refreshing Mountain Dew! At least this has sugar.

He examines the bottle again.

MEMC EC: Which raises an important question... what the actual fuck is Mountain Dew?

Silence for several seconds as he places the bottle in his cup holder.

MEMC EC: Scientists have tried to...

The all-new Ford F-150 suddenly makes a very concerning noise.

MEMC EC: What the fuck?

A series of clunks, and we get a quick cut to the all-new Ford F-150 parked on the side of the road. The Edgecrusher has the hood open and is staring at the engine.

MEMC EC: Yep... that's definitely an engine.

He turns toward the camera and holds up an AutoZone Rewards card.

MEMC EC: When your vehicle breaks down because you've been careening through the desert at ninety miles an hour while gambling and eating fast food... Get in the Zone! AutoZone!

Main Event looks under the hood again.

MEMC EC: I don't know what any of this shit does.

Smash cut to the all-new Ford F-150 back on the road, the Edgecrusher back behind the wheel.

MEMC EC: Fortunately, nothing was actually wrong. I was driving with the parking brake on the entire time. This is the all-new Ford F-150!

He slaps the steering wheel, which causes the rearview mirror to fall off.

MEMC EC: Anyway. Don't forget to tune into the XWF RELENTLESS PEPSI ZERO SUGAR PRESENTED BY TACO BELL, PROGRESSIVE INSURANCE, DRAFTKINGS, SNICKERS, MOUNTAIN DEW, AUTOZONE AND THE ALL-NEW FORD F-150 PRE-SHOW!

The Edgecrusher takes a deep breath.

MEMC EC: Free. On the Cooking Network. For some reason.

Suddenly, a GPS voice interrupts Main Event MC Edgecrusher.

GPS: Recalculating.

The Edgecrusher looks toward his dashboard.

MEMC EC: What? Not again...

GPS: Make a U-turn in a quarter mile.

He looks toward the camera.

MEMC EC: Dawg, We been going the wrong way?

Cameraman: For about forty minutes.

MEMC EC: Why didn't you tell me?

Cameraman: I did. Several times.

MEMC EC: I thought you disapproved of my choices and path in life, dawg.

Cameraman: Why the hell would I suddenly decide to judge your life in the middle of a commercial shoot?

MEMC EC: Doesn't matter now. We gotta get back to New Austin!

Main Event MC Edgecrusher violently turns the wheel, performing a U-turn. A car traveling in the opposite lane swerves to avoid hitting the all-new Ford F-150 and wraps itself around a telephone pole. We see Perry Pennyweather getting out of the wrecked vehicle as the Edgecrusher speeds away.

MEMC EC: BUILT FORD TOUGH, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!

Cut to black, then back to your regularly scheduled programming of Debbie and Dave in "The Mystery of the Hole in the Bathroom Stall."]]>

The scene opens on a sweeping shot of the desert outside New Austin, Texas. The all-new Ford F-150 comes barreling down a dusty back road. Main Event MC Edgecrusher is behind the wheel, wearing his regular "gangsta" attire, but this time a black cowboy hat sits atop his backwards baseball cap, which sits atop a dew rag, which sits atop his head. Main Event does his best cool-looking cowboy hat adjustment and looks into the camera.

MEMC EC: Howdy, dawgs.

He continues driving in silence for a few minutes.

MEMC EC: You know, people ask me all the time... they ask me... "Who are you?" and "What are you doing here?" But that's beside the point.

The Edgecrusher reaches into the nearby cup holder and grabs a nice, cold Pepsi Zero Sugar.

MEMC EC: But if they did ask me something other than that, and wanted to know what beverage I prefer while driving through Texas in a vehicle I don't own...

Main Event MC Edgecrusher holds the can of soda up, label facing the wrong direction. He realizes his mistake and adjusts the can, causing the truck to swerve slightly.

MEMC EC: Pepsi...

He cracks open the can, causing the truck to swerve again, takes a massive gulp, and instantly spits it out all over the windshield.

MEMC EC: Ahhh... this tastes like crap. What the hell is this?

He looks closer at the can.

MEMC EC: Zero Sugar? Who the hell wants to drink fucking sugarless Pepsi? Regular Pepsi is bad enough...

He remembers why he's randomly driving around on back roads with some sweaty production guy shoving a camera in his face.

MEMC EC: Pepsi, the choice of the next generation.

He gives a half-hearted thumbs-up and wings the can of Pepsi Zero Sugar out the all-new Ford F-150's window.

MEMC EC: And ya know what goes great with Pepsi Zero Sugar?

The Edgecrusher reaches into the passenger seat of the all-new Ford F-150, causing more swerving, and pulls out a bag of Taco Bell. He looks into the bag. Its contents have been spilled from the back-and-forth jerking of the all-new Ford F-150. He pulls out a handful of random broken taco shells, beef, and various toppings. Sauce and grease drip down his arm and onto the upholstery of the all-new Ford F-150.

MEMC EC: Well, technically there's a Crunchwrap somewhere in there.

The Main Event shoves the glob of what Taco Bell calls food into his mouth and starts chewing. More of it spills down the front of his shirt and into his lap than makes it into his mouth. He smiles toward the camera and speaks, food spilling from his mouth.

MEMC EC: Taco Bell... because tomorrow is Future You's problem!

He tosses the bag of Taco Bell out of the all-new Ford F-150's window. The bag smacks a random hitchhiker directly in the face and explodes. Main Event MC Edgecrusher turns to look at the chaos, and the truck fishtails and takes out several road signs before he's able to straighten back out and regain control. The Edgecrusher looks back into the camera.

MEMC EC: Good thing I've got Progressive Insurance... well... not really. I buy my car insurance from a guy out the back of a van behind the gas station.

He looks back at the road.

MEMC EC: But you could! Progressive Insurance! Because "My bad" isn't legally binding.

Main Event nods approvingly like he just dropped the realest bit of knowledge ever on the world and keeps driving.

MEMC EC: Speaking of terrible financial decisions, you know what?

The Edgecrusher pulls out his phone, causing him to swerve and take out another road sign.

MEMC EC: DraftKings!

He glances at his screen like it's the first time he's ever seen the app, because it is indeed the first time he has ever seen the app.

MEMC EC: You can bet on sports! Probably.

He glances back at his screen and taps a few buttons. The truck swerves some more, and we hear some screams.

MEMC EC: I just put forty dollars on myself to understand what a parlay is by the end of the commercial.

He tosses his phone onto the grease-soaked passenger seat.

MEMC EC: DraftKings... because fuck your kids' college tuition!

Main Event MC Edgecrusher suddenly looks extremely concerned. He begins patting his pockets. This, of course, causes him to swerve again, taking out even more road signs.

MEMC EC: Where the hell is my... there it is!

The Edgecrusher holds up a share-sized Snickers bar.

MEMC EC: You're not you when you're hungry.

He pauses and thinks about it.

MEMC EC: Which is actually terrifying when you really think about it. Who am I when I'm hungry?

Another long pause.

MEMC EC: Who is even driving this all-new Ford F-150? Is Main Event MC Edgecrusher merely the temporary manifestation of a sufficiently fed consciousness?

He slowly unwraps the share-sized Snickers bar with his teeth.

MEMC EC: Anyway... Snickers... were you ever really you to begin with?

The Edgecrusher eats the entire bar in a single bite, the long way.

MEMC EC: Sometimes you're really thirsty and...

The Edgecrusher visibly struggles not to gag.

MEMC EC: ...sometimes Pepsi Zero Sugar isn't enough.

More swerving and screams from a cat as he reaches behind the seat and pulls out a bottle of Mountain Dew, carefully inspecting the label.

MEMC EC: That's when you need a nice, refreshing Mountain Dew! At least this has sugar.

He examines the bottle again.

MEMC EC: Which raises an important question... what the actual fuck is Mountain Dew?

Silence for several seconds as he places the bottle in his cup holder.

MEMC EC: Scientists have tried to...

The all-new Ford F-150 suddenly makes a very concerning noise.

MEMC EC: What the fuck?

A series of clunks, and we get a quick cut to the all-new Ford F-150 parked on the side of the road. The Edgecrusher has the hood open and is staring at the engine.

MEMC EC: Yep... that's definitely an engine.

He turns toward the camera and holds up an AutoZone Rewards card.

MEMC EC: When your vehicle breaks down because you've been careening through the desert at ninety miles an hour while gambling and eating fast food... Get in the Zone! AutoZone!

Main Event looks under the hood again.

MEMC EC: I don't know what any of this shit does.

Smash cut to the all-new Ford F-150 back on the road, the Edgecrusher back behind the wheel.

MEMC EC: Fortunately, nothing was actually wrong. I was driving with the parking brake on the entire time. This is the all-new Ford F-150!

He slaps the steering wheel, which causes the rearview mirror to fall off.

MEMC EC: Anyway. Don't forget to tune into the XWF RELENTLESS PEPSI ZERO SUGAR PRESENTED BY TACO BELL, PROGRESSIVE INSURANCE, DRAFTKINGS, SNICKERS, MOUNTAIN DEW, AUTOZONE AND THE ALL-NEW FORD F-150 PRE-SHOW!

The Edgecrusher takes a deep breath.

MEMC EC: Free. On the Cooking Network. For some reason.

Suddenly, a GPS voice interrupts Main Event MC Edgecrusher.

GPS: Recalculating.

The Edgecrusher looks toward his dashboard.

MEMC EC: What? Not again...

GPS: Make a U-turn in a quarter mile.

He looks toward the camera.

MEMC EC: Dawg, We been going the wrong way?

Cameraman: For about forty minutes.

MEMC EC: Why didn't you tell me?

Cameraman: I did. Several times.

MEMC EC: I thought you disapproved of my choices and path in life, dawg.

Cameraman: Why the hell would I suddenly decide to judge your life in the middle of a commercial shoot?

MEMC EC: Doesn't matter now. We gotta get back to New Austin!

Main Event MC Edgecrusher violently turns the wheel, performing a U-turn. A car traveling in the opposite lane swerves to avoid hitting the all-new Ford F-150 and wraps itself around a telephone pole. We see Perry Pennyweather getting out of the wrecked vehicle as the Edgecrusher speeds away.

MEMC EC: BUILT FORD TOUGH, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!

Cut to black, then back to your regularly scheduled programming of Debbie and Dave in "The Mystery of the Hole in the Bathroom Stall."]]> https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50461 Sun, 13 Sep 2026 02:04:00 -0700 El landerson]]> https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50461 Scene shows Landerson walking out of his locker room when he sees Steve Sayors standing at his

locker room door

Steve Sayors: Landerson. How does it feel to be at RDR when you face Judd Hollow in a match where a loser must remove his mask and dreadlocks? When you face Judd Hollow this week on RDR

Care to comment, Mr Landerson.

Bit luchador| landerson: Judd Hollow had those dreadlocks for over a year and a half, and I just started wearing my Lucha mask since I came here to XWF, and now they got me fighting Judd Hollow to see which one of us will lose the match. Like, if I lose, I get to remove my mask, and if

I win, Judd Hollow gets to cut off his dreadlocks at RDR on XWF.

Steve Sayors: But what if you ended up winning the match at RDR?

Bit Luchador| Landerson: If I win, I'll keep my Lucha mask against Judd Hollow. At RDR, then once that's all over, then hopefully I'll get a future title shot against whoever retains their Championship at RDR.

Steve Sayors: Can you even outrun Judd Hollow? This Friday.

Bit Luchador| Landerson: That depends on how the match turns out cause if I win against Judd Hollow. then I will not remove my Lucha Mask. Now, if I win, then Judd will have to get rid of his dreadlocks in

our Lucha de Apuestas. At RDR, and once that's all in said and done, then maybe I could fight for the

TV Championship on the next Show of Warfare when Garisha retains his TV Championship against Remi Storm. On RDR at XWF.

Steve Sayord: anything you like to say to Judd Hollow. At RDR.

Landerson looks at the cameraman to send an address to Judd Hollow.

Bit luchador| landerson: Judd Hollow. I need to win this match more than you do, actually cause if

i lose this Lucha de Apuestas match at RDR then the whole world in Austin, Texas will no my identity so when i win at RDR against you this week then you my Rival friend will cut off your dreadlocks in front of the whole world because these people don't want there Luchador hero to see my real face but if i do win on RDR I'm still gonna show then my actual Lucha face and then put my Lucha mask right back on so without further will do please let me get this victory cause I know my Wife and Hijo are out there in the Audience is gonna watch me beat the breaks offf of you on RDR so whatever it takes Judd Hollow. I will be there to support my Familia and keep this Lucha Mask as long as I damn will pleases until I get what I truly deserve is to be the next challenger for a TV Championship at the next Warfare, right after our match Friday at RDR.

Bit Luchador| Landerson: So, Judd Hollow. I got one simple question for ya Booyka Six One

XWF Universe: Nine!

Landerson walks off when Steve Sayors continues talking

Steve Sayors: Thanks for the support, Landerson, and good luck on Friday.

Steve Sayors: We hope that Landerson can keep his Lucha mask and let Judd Hollow get rid of his dreadlocks cause landerson. might have a chance of winning and hold onto his mask so that at RDR

Landerson will win his match over Judd Hollow and see who comes out on top with the win on RDR at XWF.

Camera fades as Landerson heads back to his locker room to be with his lovely wife and Hijo before his Lucha de Apuestas match begins this Friday.

]]> Scene shows Landerson walking out of his locker room when he sees Steve Sayors standing at his

locker room door

Steve Sayors: Landerson. How does it feel to be at RDR when you face Judd Hollow in a match where a loser must remove his mask and dreadlocks? When you face Judd Hollow this week on RDR

Care to comment, Mr Landerson.

Bit luchador| landerson: Judd Hollow had those dreadlocks for over a year and a half, and I just started wearing my Lucha mask since I came here to XWF, and now they got me fighting Judd Hollow to see which one of us will lose the match. Like, if I lose, I get to remove my mask, and if

I win, Judd Hollow gets to cut off his dreadlocks at RDR on XWF.

Steve Sayors: But what if you ended up winning the match at RDR?

Bit Luchador| Landerson: If I win, I'll keep my Lucha mask against Judd Hollow. At RDR, then once that's all over, then hopefully I'll get a future title shot against whoever retains their Championship at RDR.

Steve Sayors: Can you even outrun Judd Hollow? This Friday.

Bit Luchador| Landerson: That depends on how the match turns out cause if I win against Judd Hollow. then I will not remove my Lucha Mask. Now, if I win, then Judd will have to get rid of his dreadlocks in

our Lucha de Apuestas. At RDR, and once that's all in said and done, then maybe I could fight for the

TV Championship on the next Show of Warfare when Garisha retains his TV Championship against Remi Storm. On RDR at XWF.

Steve Sayord: anything you like to say to Judd Hollow. At RDR.

Landerson looks at the cameraman to send an address to Judd Hollow.

Bit luchador| landerson: Judd Hollow. I need to win this match more than you do, actually cause if

i lose this Lucha de Apuestas match at RDR then the whole world in Austin, Texas will no my identity so when i win at RDR against you this week then you my Rival friend will cut off your dreadlocks in front of the whole world because these people don't want there Luchador hero to see my real face but if i do win on RDR I'm still gonna show then my actual Lucha face and then put my Lucha mask right back on so without further will do please let me get this victory cause I know my Wife and Hijo are out there in the Audience is gonna watch me beat the breaks offf of you on RDR so whatever it takes Judd Hollow. I will be there to support my Familia and keep this Lucha Mask as long as I damn will pleases until I get what I truly deserve is to be the next challenger for a TV Championship at the next Warfare, right after our match Friday at RDR.

Bit Luchador| Landerson: So, Judd Hollow. I got one simple question for ya Booyka Six One

XWF Universe: Nine!

Landerson walks off when Steve Sayors continues talking

Steve Sayors: Thanks for the support, Landerson, and good luck on Friday.

Steve Sayors: We hope that Landerson can keep his Lucha mask and let Judd Hollow get rid of his dreadlocks cause landerson. might have a chance of winning and hold onto his mask so that at RDR

Landerson will win his match over Judd Hollow and see who comes out on top with the win on RDR at XWF.

Camera fades as Landerson heads back to his locker room to be with his lovely wife and Hijo before his Lucha de Apuestas match begins this Friday.

]]> https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50459 Fri, 11 Sep 2026 20:32:42 -0700 Deena Hixx]]> https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50459 As the scene opened up in the arena, the cameras took a moment to pan around the arena

to show off the various signs that the fans had brought. The RDR of Red Dead Relentless audience had already seen

some amazing matches throughout the course of the evening, but there were still many more

amazing matches to be seen.

The audience gave a mixed reaction as out onto the stage skipped Deena Hixx! The not-so-stable

Woman was clearly in high spirits, and why shouldn't she be? Later in the evening, Deena would

be competing in a two-out-of-three falls match, and the winner would become a Blade Championship

at Red Dead RELENTLESS

Tig Collins: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome to the ring... Deeeeena Hixx!''

The audience gave another mixed reaction as Deena reached the bottom of the ramp and rolled

into the ring. She received a microphone, and as her music faded out, she spoke.

Geek Goddess| Deena Hixx: '' Ladies and Gentlemen... On Friday, here in  The RDR in Austin, Texas... history will be

made!''

Deena spoke with an almost psychotic grin on her face

Geek Goddess| Deena Hixx: '' And I'm sure none of you have any idea what I'm talking about.

And that's okay because I'm going to tell

you! Friday... I am going to become the XWF for The Blade Championship!''

Deena spoke grandly and gestured out to the audience as though she was delivering huge news...

But the audience didn't react. A look of rage flashed across Deena's face!

Geek Goddess| Deena Hixx:'' Shut up, John! I know you said they wouldn't care, but maybe they

just don't understand yet! You always

talk so much, and you never listen!''

Deena then realized she was talking to nobody, and she smiled apologetically out toward the

audience.

Geek Goddess| Deena Hixx: '' Sorry, John is one of the voices in my head! She's usually too

busy canooding with John to take much

notice of anything else, but as of late he's been a real bi*ch! But that doesn't matter! What matters is that in

my match Friday, I have a shot at the Blade Championship and that is massive, history-making

news because after I do that I will finally be able to get my precious back! I've been kept away

from him since Warfare of last month, despite obviously deserving to have sole custody of him! He's

been held by Razor and Jay Fetu... El Landerson and Latoya Hixx... and now John! and myself, but that's okay! Because John and. I will have to face each other

in our two out of three falls at least once on Friday... maybe twice! And if he loses it to me, then I

will finally be able to be the new Blade Champion in the next of RDR, after taking my precious away

from me at Anarchy last month!''

Deena let out a maniacal laugh, clearly excited at the prospect of getting revenge of John Blade. However, before she could say much else...

]]> As the scene opened up in the arena, the cameras took a moment to pan around the arena

to show off the various signs that the fans had brought. The RDR of Red Dead Relentless audience had already seen

some amazing matches throughout the course of the evening, but there were still many more

amazing matches to be seen.

The audience gave a mixed reaction as out onto the stage skipped Deena Hixx! The not-so-stable

Woman was clearly in high spirits, and why shouldn't she be? Later in the evening, Deena would

be competing in a two-out-of-three falls match, and the winner would become a Blade Championship

at Red Dead RELENTLESS

Tig Collins: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome to the ring... Deeeeena Hixx!''

The audience gave another mixed reaction as Deena reached the bottom of the ramp and rolled

into the ring. She received a microphone, and as her music faded out, she spoke.

Geek Goddess| Deena Hixx: '' Ladies and Gentlemen... On Friday, here in  The RDR in Austin, Texas... history will be

made!''

Deena spoke with an almost psychotic grin on her face

Geek Goddess| Deena Hixx: '' And I'm sure none of you have any idea what I'm talking about.

And that's okay because I'm going to tell

you! Friday... I am going to become the XWF for The Blade Championship!''

Deena spoke grandly and gestured out to the audience as though she was delivering huge news...

But the audience didn't react. A look of rage flashed across Deena's face!

Geek Goddess| Deena Hixx:'' Shut up, John! I know you said they wouldn't care, but maybe they

just don't understand yet! You always

talk so much, and you never listen!''

Deena then realized she was talking to nobody, and she smiled apologetically out toward the

audience.

Geek Goddess| Deena Hixx: '' Sorry, John is one of the voices in my head! She's usually too

busy canooding with John to take much

notice of anything else, but as of late he's been a real bi*ch! But that doesn't matter! What matters is that in

my match Friday, I have a shot at the Blade Championship and that is massive, history-making

news because after I do that I will finally be able to get my precious back! I've been kept away

from him since Warfare of last month, despite obviously deserving to have sole custody of him! He's

been held by Razor and Jay Fetu... El Landerson and Latoya Hixx... and now John! and myself, but that's okay! Because John and. I will have to face each other

in our two out of three falls at least once on Friday... maybe twice! And if he loses it to me, then I

will finally be able to be the new Blade Champion in the next of RDR, after taking my precious away

from me at Anarchy last month!''

Deena let out a maniacal laugh, clearly excited at the prospect of getting revenge of John Blade. However, before she could say much else...

]]> https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50458 Thu, 10 Sep 2026 22:40:08 -0700 Jay Fetu]]> https://xwf1999.com/showthread.php?tid=50458 The next scene opens backstage on the rarely used Tig Collins, but of course she wasn't

alone, quickly joining her in frame was the Main Event, Jay Fetu, proudly sporting his Black

Ula Fala. The Hot Texas quickly greeted Jay with the usual loud pop and YEET chants.

Tig Collins: Jay. at Warfare, Deena Hixx and yourself had an electric and

intense match where you two threw everything you had at each other. In the end, you were able

to lose the victory, so  that begs the question, what's next for Jay  Fetu? Where do you go from

here?

Jay Fetu| Main Event: Aye. Big Ups and major respect to Deena Hixx. Uce did exactly what she gon'

do. I  was still feelin' it long after we got off the wrong start, but befo' I get into what's next, yooo..

Austin, Texas.

He lookd directly at the camera.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: The Arena Armadillo. Main Event, Jay Fetu is now in yo' CITTYYYY!!!

YEET!

Jay Fetu| Main Event: As you and er' body can tell, I was granted wit' a much more important role

in my fam, and I'm 'boutta take that seriously, not jus' wit' 'em, but 'round here, Uce.

Jay took a small moment to stare at the Ula Fala around his neck.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: At RELENTLESS, Kenny Styles wanted me to get' em all I  got and it's exactly

what I did, Uce. He pushed me to places that i didn't think I had, and i did exactly the same fo' him

I  made 'em realize I'm more then jus' a last name, that all I want 'round here, I'm willing' to put

that work instead of takin' the easy way out by cutting' corners and takin' Kenny a shortcut. I can't

do that, and out there... they all know it too.

YEET!

Jay Fetu| Main Event: The Opportunity was there fo' me Uce. I jus' hadda say yes. I'd be lyin' fo' a

split second if i said I didn't think  'bout it, and you asked me what's next, where I go from here, Uce? I only got one thang in mind.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: Aye! Austin. Think it's time we run thangs back, from 'round his time last year.

YEET!

Tig Collins: If that means what we're all thinking, didn't you publicly state with Steve Sayors

that you weren't trying to get caught up in all of that again?

Jay Fetu| Main Event: I did.

Jay nodded.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: But I also said, not yet... meaning' at the time I didn't. Thangs been happ'nin'

round here, Uce. Thangs that needa be put down, and I've stood on the side long 'nough now to see it go down, and i ain't gon'  do that anymo'. The one other Uces who tried to stop' em, they

ain't here right now, but you know who is, and ain't gon' take their 'ish no' mo. Me!

YEET!

Jay Fetu| Main Event:  Few weeks ago. I hadda stand here wit' Kenny Styles goin' on and on when he kept interrupting' me. he was right doe, Uce, I ain't goin' away. i'll keep bein' that annoyin'

thorn in his side. I won't go away. she can't get rid of me, no matter the  shady 'ish they pull  'gainst

me, and fo' every heinous thang her and her crew do, I'm gon' be there.

Tig Collins: And do you have an idea how to do any of that, so it's not a repeat of things for

yourself, like last year?

Jay Fetu| Main Event:  No.

He had to be honest about that.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: When ya got other's 'round here who'd rather do their own thangs, figure

their own way out know how to handle Kenny Styles. this, kinda hard to reach out and try to figure

'ish out together, which is why if I

gotta be a one Samoan Army...

Jay paused for a moment, he looked at Tig, shrugged.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: So be it, but SOMETHIN' needs to be done 'bout this. We all can't keep standin' round, lettin' it happ'n.

Tig Collins: Thanks for your time, Jay.

YEET!

]]> The next scene opens backstage on the rarely used Tig Collins, but of course she wasn't

alone, quickly joining her in frame was the Main Event, Jay Fetu, proudly sporting his Black

Ula Fala. The Hot Texas quickly greeted Jay with the usual loud pop and YEET chants.

Tig Collins: Jay. at Warfare, Deena Hixx and yourself had an electric and

intense match where you two threw everything you had at each other. In the end, you were able

to lose the victory, so  that begs the question, what's next for Jay  Fetu? Where do you go from

here?

Jay Fetu| Main Event: Aye. Big Ups and major respect to Deena Hixx. Uce did exactly what she gon'

do. I  was still feelin' it long after we got off the wrong start, but befo' I get into what's next, yooo..

Austin, Texas.

He lookd directly at the camera.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: The Arena Armadillo. Main Event, Jay Fetu is now in yo' CITTYYYY!!!

YEET!

Jay Fetu| Main Event: As you and er' body can tell, I was granted wit' a much more important role

in my fam, and I'm 'boutta take that seriously, not jus' wit' 'em, but 'round here, Uce.

Jay took a small moment to stare at the Ula Fala around his neck.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: At RELENTLESS, Kenny Styles wanted me to get' em all I  got and it's exactly

what I did, Uce. He pushed me to places that i didn't think I had, and i did exactly the same fo' him

I  made 'em realize I'm more then jus' a last name, that all I want 'round here, I'm willing' to put

that work instead of takin' the easy way out by cutting' corners and takin' Kenny a shortcut. I can't

do that, and out there... they all know it too.

YEET!

Jay Fetu| Main Event: The Opportunity was there fo' me Uce. I jus' hadda say yes. I'd be lyin' fo' a

split second if i said I didn't think  'bout it, and you asked me what's next, where I go from here, Uce? I only got one thang in mind.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: Aye! Austin. Think it's time we run thangs back, from 'round his time last year.

YEET!

Tig Collins: If that means what we're all thinking, didn't you publicly state with Steve Sayors

that you weren't trying to get caught up in all of that again?

Jay Fetu| Main Event: I did.

Jay nodded.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: But I also said, not yet... meaning' at the time I didn't. Thangs been happ'nin'

round here, Uce. Thangs that needa be put down, and I've stood on the side long 'nough now to see it go down, and i ain't gon'  do that anymo'. The one other Uces who tried to stop' em, they

ain't here right now, but you know who is, and ain't gon' take their 'ish no' mo. Me!

YEET!

Jay Fetu| Main Event:  Few weeks ago. I hadda stand here wit' Kenny Styles goin' on and on when he kept interrupting' me. he was right doe, Uce, I ain't goin' away. i'll keep bein' that annoyin'

thorn in his side. I won't go away. she can't get rid of me, no matter the  shady 'ish they pull  'gainst

me, and fo' every heinous thang her and her crew do, I'm gon' be there.

Tig Collins: And do you have an idea how to do any of that, so it's not a repeat of things for

yourself, like last year?

Jay Fetu| Main Event:  No.

He had to be honest about that.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: When ya got other's 'round here who'd rather do their own thangs, figure

their own way out know how to handle Kenny Styles. this, kinda hard to reach out and try to figure

'ish out together, which is why if I

gotta be a one Samoan Army...

Jay paused for a moment, he looked at Tig, shrugged.

Jay Fetu| Main Event: So be it, but SOMETHIN' needs to be done 'bout this. We all can't keep standin' round, lettin' it happ'n.

Tig Collins: Thanks for your time, Jay.

YEET!

]]>